Nabiilah Tjandra

Rembulan ing wengi menika sumunar lir remen ndeleng ati kula. Padhangipun ngelingake  dhumateng rawuhipun panjenengan ingkang takpendhet ing papan paling elmok. Nalika adoh lan mboten saged pinanggih, kula nyenyuwun ing pandonga, mugi panjenengan tansah pinaringan rahayu, pinaringan tentreming manah, lan tansah kasinungan pepadang. Lan kanthi asma panjenengan, kula ngaturaken donga dhumateng Sang Hyang Pencipta, mugi langkah panjenengan tansah kaayomi. Awit saben rembulan munggah ing langit, kula ngraos kados panjenengan ngintunaken panglipur ing sajroning wengi, lan kangen punika dados langkung wening awit panjenengan tansah ing njero pandongan.

Runtutan kepergian orang-orang terdekat akhir-akhir ini membuatku sadar bahwa satu-satunya kepastian di dunia ini adalah kita semua akan mati. Kita akan terurai, lalu perlahan dilupakan. — sebuah renungan sunyi, bukan doktrin keagamaan . Di dunia ini tidak ada salahnya mengejar apa yang kita mau. Karier, kekayaan, pencapaian, bahkan orang-orang yang kita kasihi. Semua itu memang untuk diraih, dimiliki, dipamerkan, dibanggakan. Namun, ada hari-hari aku bahagia. Ada hari aku optimis. Ada pula hari aku bingung dengan arah hidup.  Namun setelah semua itu, aku sadar: hampir tidak pernah ada hari di mana aku benar-benar takut akan mati. Padahal sesekali, rasa takut itu muncul. Tentang apa yang terjadi setelahnya. Tentang tanah, langit, ruang yang tak terlihat. Tentang hidup setelah mati yang dulu sering diceritakan waktu kecil, ketika berangkat TPQ setiap sore. Tentang takdir yang tidak bisa kulawan—dan bagaimana melawannya pun aku tak punya gambaran. Mungkinkah aku suatu hari berkata,...

When I was younger, I imagined my twenties would be filled with adventure, spontaneous trips, long conversations under city lights, and people who would always stay. I thought I’d have it all figured out by now: my career, my relationships, my place in the world. I wasn’t completely wrong, but I wasn’t completely right either. Being 23 feels like standing on shattered ground, everything you’ve ever known begins to crack, and you have no choice but to move forward, even when you don’t know what’s waiting on the other side. No one warns you how confusing it feels when life quietly shifts. People start their own journeys; some move away, some get too busy, and some just fade from your story. Suddenly, the people who used to be a constant part of your days are just familiar names in your contact list. And you realize: it’s not because anyone stopped caring, it’s because everyone’s trying to figure out their own chaos too. At 23, loneliness feels like a quiet companion. It visits you on...

one day, we'll go everywhere, I mean, literally everywhere, across oceans under foreign skies through cities witnessing many places and taste different dishes one day, we'll go everywhere. -n

him, to whom I would lay my head on him, to whom I would pick a flower for him, to whom I would rest my worries upon him, to whom I would write my every poem and him, to whom I would give my love — only my love -n